i know summers over, man.

ehem you look huger than you are, douchey.
BUT i still need to get this off of my chest!!!

LADIESS, LADIES laadiees.
i know the monokini was the thing this year (and i hate to break it to you, the year before actually. it seems lil ole' orlando gets the fashion memo a lil late)..AND some of them just look so cute and tackily tempting- but THEY are NOT for everyone. so we're a lil chubby, say, and we are tryna convice ourselves it will work cause its still a one piece- NO. if you are wider in the hip/stomach area- CUTTTING 2 HUGE HOLES OVER THE TOP IS NOT GONNA HIDE IT. hello, obvious city! just go with a whole one piece


trust me. theyre SEXIER. there;s nothing sexier than a classic one piece. quit playin.

if you have a lil pudgy tummy, dont wear a monokini slit down the center, same for backfat and muffin tops. STOP PUTTING TOO BIG HIGHLIGHTIN' ASS CIRCLES AROUND THE AREA.

and even if you arent fat- they sure do make you look that way.

JUST KNOCK IT OFF.